The Bike is Scary:(

So last year,when Kelly & I were slogging through all the hot miles preparing for Chicago, we fantasized about doing anything rather than running. I'd like to say that our fantasies involved anything interesting, but alas, they only involved exercises to replace running on hard roads - trail running, hot yoga, triathlons, etc (with maybe a few thoughts about food thrown in for fun). At Kelly's urging, triathlons sounded cool - anything had to be better than all this running - and I would get to buy cool new stuff! The excitement of getting new running shoes & those very high fashion running clothes had worn off - what better to replace it with than a bike! An endless supply of new things...Also, I had come across this great new training plan for marathons. It only involved running 3 days week - yes, 3 days. I only had to add cross-training in to replace the extra running days & I'd be set. Well, that was all I needed - I told Kelly I'd do it & mentally committed. Off to the store to look at bikes - cha-ching!

Fast forward a couple of months. After looking at bikes I began to waffle. These didn't look anything like my old 10-speed Schwinn from junior high. The wheels were impossibly skinny & look - no tread. I was sure I'd go careening off the road on the first turn I took. Fear began to creep in. Then - I watched last year's Ironman coverage & fear took a firm hold. The coverage highlighted 2 different athletes both who were wheelchair division participants but had previously been non-wheelchair participants. Both had been paralyzed after being involved accidents on the bike. Uh oh - this sounded scary to me. All of a sudden riding hundreds of miles out on the roads with crazy drivers eating, talking on their cell-phones, yelling at their kids, etc. began to sound decidedly un-fun. No way - I wasn't doing this. Sorry Kelly - back to marathons for me. (Now you know how I got into Marine Corps after swearing to never do another after Chicago last year). If you've read my other posts, you probably think that I must have gotten over my fear - after all, I did sign up for Ironman next year. No - I'm still a big scaredy-cat, I just really want to do something other that run all the time. My joints just can't take it. Hobbling around the house for 2 days after a long run is really not that attractive.

Before actually signing up for Ironman, I went riding my old mountain bike to be sure that I could actually still do it. Yes - not so bad. I stayed in my neighborhood & my butt hurt like hell but I stayed upright; went forward & didn't totally freak over hills, bumps and curves. I got a little (okay a lot) tense every time a car went by & I was probably only going 10 mph but I made it. After several outings like this, I went out to get my new bike (I'll save that experience for another post) & brought it home to give it a whirl. Utter terror! All of a sudden I was way off the ground (apparently my saddle had been to low), all bent over and going much faster. The brakes & shifters were no longer in front of me on my nice upright handle bars but were way out on the bend of my new bars. I think I rode about 2 miles that first day and gripped the bike so hard the whole way that my hands hurt for hours after I got back. Needless to say, improvement was needed!

I've kept at it since then & have definitely gotten better. I now regularly ride 15-20 miles 3 times a week & usually try to throw in a longer ride (42 miles to date) once a week. I've moved out onto the real road (instead of my somewhat safe neighborhood) & actually go kind of fast on the down-hills & flats (I think I've hit about 39 mph once going down). However, I have a really long way to go. I still grip the handlebars way too hard. I tend to ride the brakes down hills. I'm absolutely terrified of my aero bars & won't ride in them around curves, over bumps or anywhere where I think a car might be. Also, yesterday, I'm embarrassed to admit that I actually walked down a hill - yes, down a hill.

Kelly & I were riding a partially new route that took us on this really hilly, curvy, bumpy back road. I was actually doing great until we came to this cross street that was supposed to bridge a creek and connect us with another road we wanted to be on. Wellllll...we got to the road and it was straight downhill with a big curve halfway down so we couldn't see the bottom. OMG - this brought that feeling in the pit of my stomach kind of like a roller coaster does. You must be kidding me! I unclipped and stood at the top while Kelly took off like a bat out of hell. You could kind of hear her scream floating up to the top as she flew down the road. Of course I couldn't really be sure she made it to the bottom since I couldn't see it. Being the good friend that I am, I knew I was at least going to have to go down to make sure she was still alive. I backed away from the grade, clipped back in and headed for the down-hill. NO WAY! I just couldn't do it. I slammed on the brakes, unclipped again & felt like throwing up - I guess I was going to have to walk down. I still hadn't heard from Kelly so in trepidation I started down. Quite honestly, it was probably more hazardous walking down this gravelly road in my cleats but I never said I wasn't crazy. I was about half way down I heard Kelly hollering up at me. At least she was alive. I finally made it to the bottom to find her in one piece. Yeah! I wouldn't have to carry her home. However, the road didn't pass through so we had to go back up. Boo! Needless to say, it was a long walk back up.

By now, I'm sure you can't believe that I'm going to actually attempt to ride 112 miles next October. What a wuss I am. However, it's not all bad. I've actually fallen off of my bike 4 times now & haven't died yet (knock on wood). Weirdly this actually boosts my confidence a little. Although not bad accidents, each one has gotten progressively more embarrassing & a little more painful. All of them involved being clipped into my pedals. The first three all happened when I was at intersections, started to go, had to stop & fell over when I tried to catch myself with my right foot. I always unclip my left foot when I stop. You'd think I'd have this figured out by now. The embarrassing part is that my audience has gotten larger each time. The 3rd time I fell I think there was a line of about 20 cars waiting with me at the intersection. I just wanted to sink into the ground.

My last fall was a little more serious. I wasn't going very fast as I was trying to figure out why my bike computer wasn't working. I was kind of looking down when I hit a bump & over I went. If my feet hadn't been clipped into those damn pedals, I would have caught myself. However, this time I really went over - both feet were clipped in & I fell hard on my hip & then somehow bounced over & scraped up my knee, hand & shoulder. I'm sure the 3 cars that stopped to witness my embarrassment were amazed that someone can maneuver that way going only about 8 mph! The bruise on my hip is extra cool - about the size of my palm & lots of pretty colors! I was even lucky enough to bruise the same hip that I'm having ITB problems with. You can imagine how much fun my 20 mile run this past Saturday was!

Anyway, again, in that weird way, I feel better knowing that I actually fell off & didn't do more damage to myself. I must be a total psycho. However, maybe if I'm lucky, I won't have to experience any more falls anytime soon. In the meantime, I'm going to continue to work on my fear management & try to relax on the bike. I'm not worried about the distance, just making it in one piece! Now, I'm going for a ride.

WORKOUT TODAY: Biked 14 miles & pulled out all my flowers for fall (really there were a lot!)